welcome to poketopia

[crazy azn7200]

hey this is my first fan fic so be nice and leave good comments!
Disclaimer:I don't own pokemon ;D

Chapter 1
"here we go! lets start the final match of the sinnoh league championship!"the MC exclaimed.
"and our final 2 contenders will now battle for the champion ship!"
"our first challenger is Joshua from Goldenrod city!"the MC said.
"and his opponent ash ketchum from the town of Pallet!"
ash looked around to see all of his friends from all of his adventures. He saw Misty, Gary, Dawn, professor oak, his mom, Brock,and of course May,but ash kept himself on the match
"this will be a 2 on 2 pokemon battle"the ref said.
"let the match begin!"
"I choose you, Ivysuar!"Joshua said."Ivysuar!"Ivysuar said.
"come on out, Infernape!"ash said."Infernape!"infernape said
"Infernape use flamethrower!"ash exclaimed.
"Ivysuar dodge it and use energy ball!"Joshua said
infernape used flamethrower on ivysuar and it hit
"IVYSSSUUUUAAAAARRRR!"ivysuar said
"ivysuar is unable to battle Infernape wins!"the ref yelled
"ivysuar return!!! you did a great job out there"Joshua said
"good job infernape"ash said
"what will his next pokemon be?"the mc said
"LET'S GO, Empoleon!!!"Josh said
'uh oh, this can't be good' ash thought
"Empoleon use hydro cannon!!!"Josh said
"dodge it!"ash exclaimed
but it was to late the hydro cannon was to fast
"Infernape is unable to battle, Empoleon wins!"the ref yelled.
"return, Infernape, you did an excellent job out there!"ash said
"Pikachu, lets go buddy!"ash said.
"Pika pika!" pikachu said.
"alright! pikachu use thunderbolt!"ash said
"pikaCHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUU!!!"
pikachu used thunderbolt on empoleon and it hit
"empoleon's unable to battle pikachu wins"
"the victor is ash ketchum!!"the mc said.
The crowd was nearly screaming after the match.
after the match May went up to ash and gave ash a little surprise
"Hey ash!"May said
ash turned around and said "hey May! so what's up?
"Nothing I only wanted give you a surprise."May said looking away to hide her blush.
"so what's the surprise?"ash asked also looking down trying to hide his blush by looking at her deep sapphire blue eyes
"This"she said and kissed ash in the lips turning really red.
ash was very surprised that she kissed him on the lips and decided to kiss back. but then they were interrupted by a man in a white tuxedo. They pulled away quickly blushing like mad.
"Excuse me, but are you ash ketchum?"the man in the white tux said.
"yes, I am"he said
"I am offering you to go to a brand new Island called poketopia."the man in the tux said"and by the way my name is Dan I am the mayor of poketopia and I just watched your match and I think your the best candidate for our coliseums."
"what's a coliseum?"ash asked.
"Well"Dan said"a coliseum is basically like a tournament but there a coliseum leader or as would you say gym leader and each leader has a different style of match, so would you like to come to poketopia ash?"
"most definitely yeah!!!"ash exclaimed
"some things never change."may said walking down with ash to go to the celebration party.

[timoteyo7]

......Well magicman you did tell us to be nice and leave you good comments but I would be lying to myself and you if I didn't say what I'm about to say and plus lying would not give you the ability to improve on your fanfic writing skills.

First of all the Fanfic was very short and very random. Next you need to space out the sentences, provide more detail and plus you need to capitalize Ash (Characters names) and the first letter of a sentence. You also need to use more proper grammar as well.

I'm not being mean because well I'm not a mean person I like to joke around but I can be pretty serious when I want to and I think it would be a betrayal of myself to lie to you and say "WOW MAN THIS WAS AWESOME KEEP IT UP!!" No because a more sensible person could tell after reading this that's bullshit. No offence, as this is your first Fanfiction. I recommend that you go on FF and read other fanfictions and study from them to become better. Thats what I did and look at the success of my FF's.

Sorry if I didn't follow your wishes to give you good comments but I just think I would be basically be kissing your ass if I did.

[crazy azn7200]

ok! thanks!

[timoteyo7]

no problem buddy!

[crazy azn7200]

hey guys this is a more funny chapter ok! hope you enjoy! ;D

chapter 2
After the match inside the locker room Ash was not just thinking about his victory but about May.
'Man that kiss was just very surprising, I think I like her ,no, I think I l-love her.'Ash thought while looking at her.
'Oh man! I did something very stupid revealing my secret that I love Ash by kissing him.' May thought 'I hope I didn't break our friendship.'
"Hey May"Ash said"I have something to say to you, I-"but Ash was interrupted by May"I'm very sorry Ash I didn't mean to-"but was interrupted by Ash's lips.
"you don't have to be sorry May I really liked the kiss."Ash said with a happy tone
"so does that mean were boyfriend and girlfriend now?"May asked.
Ash just nodded and walked out of the locker room and down the hallway with his new girlfriend holding her hand.
But in the back spying on the new couple was someone with green hair and emerald eyes named shrubby, I mean Drew.
'I'll get you ketchum and when I do I'll be May's new boyfriend' shrubby, I mean Drew thought.But then a crowd of Drew fangirls carried Drew off somewhere tearing off his clothes.
"AAAAHHHHH!!! HELP ME!!!!!"shrubby yelled.
Back where Ash and May were they some how managed to here Drew's yell. "Did I here someone call shrub-I mean Drew's name out?"Ash asked' more like shrubby boy hehehe' Ash thought
"Hm, you know, I think I did here Drew's name being called out."May said resting her head on Ash's broad muscular shoulders.
After that situation Ash and all of his friends including his girlfriend, went to the celebration of Ash winning the sinnoh league set up by his mom Delia and Professor Oak.
As soon as Ash got there he and May took loads of food from the buffet and starting eating immediately stuffing their faces.
"mmmmm, this is really great food."Ash said still eating.
"And the noodles are even better at than the noodles back at home!"May said happily.
After dinner Ash met up with Dan to discuss his when to leave for poketopia, then went up to announce his next move in battling.
"Everyone, I have an announcement to make, I just got an offer from the mayor of poketopia to compete in pokemon Colosseums there."Ash said excitedly.
Everyone clapped for Ash's new goal to become poketopia master.
After the celebration Ash went to go see May
"Hey May, I have something to show you "May turned around and saw Ash."Hey Ash, so what is it you want to show me?"
Ash took out a ticket"here"Ash said and handed the ticket to May.
"Is this it? a ticket?"May asked.
"not just a ticket but a ticket to come with me to poketopia and have fun there and thats not all."Ash took out a golden necklace
and gave it to May"It's beautiful Ash!"May said giving Ash a kiss on the lips again.
"Y-your w-welcome."Ash said stuttering a bit.
After the next few days Ash and May flew off on a plane and went to poketopia.

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hoped you liked it!!!